Babies get heavy as they get older. Did you know that? Seesh. But that’s not really the point of this post.
In 2011, I had a miscarriage and it was one of the most devastating things that has ever happened to me (I could write a whole separate post about that experience…perhaps some other time…). And it’s not like I hadn’t been around loss before…but nothing THAT close to home had happened. For a few weeks after, I cried myself to sleep. I’d see pregnant women waddling around, clearly miserable but all I could think is how lucky they were. And I decided that if God would ever bless us with a healthy baby I would never complain and count it all as a blessing. And I think I did a pretty good job. By the end, I was definitely ready to not be pregnant anymore, but I was just happy to have a healthy baby in there. I just wasn’t one of those women that LOVES being pregnant. I guess the 2nd trimester wasn’t too bad. When you aren’t sick all day, you have energy and you’re cute-pregnant.
Now I’m stuck in a new battle. I have the most adorable baby. Seriously, she’s awesome. Except when she doesn’t want to nap. Then she’s not so cute. But now I’m stuck with a ‘mom body’. You know, all squishy and soft. Ugh.
And I’m trying hard not to complain. I know there are women out there who would be awesome parents and are just having such a hard time getting pregnant. They would love to be squishy all over if it meant they could have a baby in their arms. I was one of them.
But it’s been 9 months. I had gotten in the best shape of my life a few months before I became pregnant. So I was hopeful that this would carry me through and help me lose the weight after. Here’s my before and after P90X (not to mention a much better hair cut… and some color on my face) from before my biological clock got really loud. Hi, cheek bones. I miss you! Come back to me!
And typically I do pretty good, emotionally that is. Considering that according to my doctor, I’m basically going through menopause. Neat. But then there’s that one lady who shatters it and asks if I’m pregnant.
Seriously. You see the baby…just because Hollywood has ruined everyone’s perception of what your body is supposed to look like after birth, doesn’t mean you have the right to assume that I’m pregnant. Who asks that?! And sure, right after J was born and I still relied on my maternity clothes stash to dress myself, people would ask…but only if I wasn’t holding J. And I could understand. And they would feel awful. But now…now that we’re much farther down the road and just as I’m getting some sort of self-confidence/esteem back, someone has to ruin it.
But then a month ago, I decided enough is enough. I’m better than letting what other people say dictate how I feel about myself. I found out that the creator of the Insanity workouts did a free 15 minute workout on the Dr. Oz show. I made a little chart, complete with stickers (yes, I’m nearing 30 and like a potty training toddler, stickers work for me…). My goal was do do this every day while J napped. This is the start of week 5 and I’m down 4 pounds (so averaging a pound a week…not bad) and about 2.5″ in my waist. AND, perhaps the most exciting is my abs are finally coming back together (Did you know they separate? It’s the weirdest thing to try and do a sit up and seriously NOT be able to.) There are all kinds of articles out there with warnings about rushing to fix this problem so I was leery to do much about it. But with this little workout, you do so many squats and if you tighten your abs, it’s basically a little crunch…which seems to be working well for me! I still have a ways to go, but at least I can’t stick my whole finger between them! (Gross? Sorry…but it is what it is.)
And I’m tired of starting over. I tried doing P90X once I got ‘exercise approval’ from my Dr., but I couldn’t spend an hour doing that with an 10 week old (I had some complications healing which delayed my exercise). Then I tried another exercise video, a quick 20 minute cardio workout, but I was still too sore to be jumping and kicking. Anyway, I finally just threw caution to the wind and worked through it. And here we are. With my little bit of progress made, I really don’t want to start over again.
So there’s that. Not really much point (like my other posts have major points?) but after a conversation with another new mom, it just felt right to ramble about it.
J turns one in early June, and my goal is to be at my pre-pregnant weight by then. About 10 weeks. …I need to step it up and loose about 2 pounds a week if I’m going to make that deadline. I have a long way to go! Wish me luck…